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Women: Stop over-analyzing your dates!

It’s been said that men over simplify and women over analyze?

How much mental energy do most women use trying to figure out how their date feels about them?

Most women get waaaaaaay too involved in trying to figure out what their date thinks about them; They want to connect with their date and they think that by understanding and analyzing every detail of the date that this will help them achieve their goal.

The truth is that over analyzing your date doesn’t help.

A funny story about analyzing.

Tonight, I thought my date was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it.

Conversation wasn’t flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn’t say much. I asked him what was wrong. He said, ‘Nothing.’ I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn’t upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.

On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can’t explain his behavior. I don’t know why he didn’t say, ‘I love you, too.’ When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent.

Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. To my surprise, he responded to my caress, and we made love. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep -I cried. I don’t know what to do. I’m almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.

His Diary: My motorcycle wouldn’t start today, I’m not sure why, but at least I got laid.

Stop analyzing your dates!

The more you over analyze your date the more stressed you’ll feel about dating.

Stop hanging all your hopes and dreams on one man, maybe even before you know all that much about him.

Shift the focus

I’m not saying to totally disregard what he says, but try shifting your focus towards not whether or not he likes you, but rather towards whether or not you like yourself when you’re with him.

If you feel great about yourself when you’re on a date with him then you’re dating the right man. And if you feel insecure or unhappy when you are with him, then perhaps you need to rethink whether he’s the right person.

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Comments (17)

  • Avatar

    Toni Martin

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    Sound advice; beauty glow from within.

    Reply

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    Giles

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    Awww thanks for kind words Toni 🙂

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    Beej

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    Good thoughts! I never thought about it like that.

    Reply

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    Misty

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    Great advice! I wish I would’ve read this article when I was younger. It would’ve saved alot of time obsessing! hahahaahha

    Reply

  • Avatar

    Giles

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    Beej:
    Thanks for nice comment
    Misty
    Sorry I didn’t write the Article sooner~ I guess I was over analyzing my words LOL!

    Reply

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    Nora

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    Arggghhh! If only communication could be better between men and women…Would it have really been so hard to just tell her that the damn motorcycle wouldn’t start? Instead people play games and instead of saying how we feel, we respond by saying “Nothing is wrong” when in reality often “something” is wrong. How are we supposed to differentiate when our partner is being passive or actually telling the truth? Or am I over analyzing this? =P

    Reply

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    Anthony

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    Long overdue advice! Thanks.

    Reply

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    Giles

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    Nora! LOL your post made me laugh out loud as its such a feminine point of view (To the Man nothing was wrong, he was just curious as to why it wouldn’t start!) Thanks for posting 🙂

    Anthony thanks for nice words!

    Reply

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    Frank

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    Why does everything have to revolve around feelings?!

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    Sean

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    Love what you’re doing here Giles. Thank you!

    Reply

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    Melanie Clark

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    Great advice! I call this the alternate Universe! When a woman does not know the answer about whats going on with a guy she makes it up in her head based on her past experiences. The best thing to do is remind yourself that not everything is about you and give him some space to figure it out on his own. He will include you when he is ready. Just keep it moving and be happy with yourself as Giles said. Great blog!

    Reply

  • Avatar

    Giles

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    Classic comment Frank, that has most guys smiling!

    Reply

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    Giles

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    Thanks for nice words Sean!

    Reply

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    Giles

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    Awww thanks Melanie!

    Reply

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    Merav

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    Funny and true!

    Reply

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    karine

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    Great advice indeed! Love this article 🙂

    Reply

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    Annie

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    I analyze Waaayyyy to much so this made me laugh

    Reply

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