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A shortage of single women?

The demographics have flipped, and single women are now in demand.

“How lovely to hear!” say the women, who remember too well growing up in the shadow of the 1986 Newsweek article that warned that a 40 year old female college grad had a better chance of getting hit by a terrorist than she did of marrying…

“But…but…how could this be?” say the dumbfounded 40-something men – the guys who opted to postpone marriage, who spent early adulthood chumming with their guy pals, in a dating frenzy, or in a series of non-committal relationships. Many of these men are now ready for the real thing… and are getting a rude wake-up call.

“There’s a new biological clock out there – the one ticking inside bachelors”, claims the article.

Hmmmm. Let’s ponder the statistics… back in the 1980’s, sites the Wall Street Journal, “there were about 1.3 women for every eligible man from 35 to 44. The odds were even better for the narrower group of men in their late 30s dating women in their early 30s: Almost two women for every single man.” Cockiness-inspiring odds, wouldn’t you say? The guys must have been happy.

But…now the shift. From 1955 to 1973 the birthrate dropped 40%. That means fewer girls were born, and given that American men have tended to prefer dating younger women, we begin to see the statistical problem. The Census Bureau’s Current Population Surveys show that “the percentage of 35- 44-year old bachelors almost tripled from 1980 to 2000.” Census reports indicate further that “by 2010 men in their late 30s and early 40s will outnumber women five to 10 years younger by two to one… and within nine years, there will be one woman that’s 30 to 34 for every two men 35 to 44, according to one set of projections by the U.S. Census.”

“OUCH!” Say the men.

So what’s going on out there as a result? Well, men are increasingly turning to personal ads and dating services – not that their odds are good there either – dating service membership bases have traditionally been male dominant, and with the demographic shift we now see shrinking pools of female advertisers in the newspaper personals and in dating service memberships. And, reports the WSJ, “Other men are going where experts say they need to – older women. When Match.com polled its members earlier this year, the company discovered that its average male client is now willing to date a woman three years his senior, up from two a few years ago. At It’s Just Lunch, men 35 to 43 are now asking to date women 36 to 40 – up about four years from a decade ago.”

So, what does Cupid’s Coach have to say about all this? Gentlemen…start your engines! For those men who are rigid in their preference for a younger woman, it’s going to be competitive. If you mean to be successful in your love search, you’d better have a strategic marketing plan, you’ll be wise to get a realistic assessment of your ‘Romantic Market Value’ and you’ll be sharpening your edge by broadening your scope.

Help is here, though. Book a session with me. Best way I know to jump start your love life and better your odds. And more good news – Cupid’s Coach was built by women for women – they’re flocking to us (80% by invitation and referral) and our Client base is, well, 60% female. You’re in good hands!

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

The Real Secret To Successful Online Dating

Online dating

It’s no surprise that the people who find happiness always seem to be the people who had most of it to begin with.

It’s been a while since dating sites were used only by the desperate and the terminally shy. These days, singles see them as a giant opportunity to find a partner. It’s simple. It’s fun. It’s convenient.

And it gets results… so why bother with the old fashioned ways? Most passes just seem to get rejected, blind dates are about as enjoyable as a poke in the eye with a sharp stick, and all the good ones seem to have gone online anyway.

It sounds like a reasonable approach to online dating, and it’s one adopted frequently by recent divorcees who have been out of the dating game for a while and simply don’t get to meet singles at dinner parties.

It’s also an approach that’s likely to end in failure.

The real secret to online dating is that it works best when you use it as just one method of meeting people.

You still have to find a way of starting a conversation with strangers you find attractive. If a friend says that she knows someone who would be perfect for you, you still have to swallow hard and agree to meet them.

And you still have to believe that your singlehood could end at absolutely any minute because there are plenty of good people still out there, and hoping to meet someone just like you.

There are two reasons that dating sites work best when combined with other methods of finding love.

The first is that it means you’re not desperate. Your profile won’t look over-keen, your emails won’t make it clear that you really, really hope they write back, and you’ll make better judgments about the people you want to contact.

When you feel there are plenty of opportunities offline too, you’ll be pickier about the people you see online, and you’ll increase the odds that the people you do meet will be people you’ll want to meet again.

The second reason though is that you’ll be happier. You’ll have a positive attitude towards dating as a whole. You’ll develop an active social life and you’ll see online dating for what it should be: a fun experience that could lead to so much more, not the solution to a never-ending problem.

It’s no surprise that the people who find happiness always seem to be the people who had most of it to begin with. Make sure that you can be happy without online dating, and you’ll find that your website will make you even happier still.

Is Your Profile All It Could Be? Find Out With A Profile Review

Online dating profile, before and after example

Online dating profile, before and after example

Writing an effective dating site profile isn’t easy. It’s no small thing to blow your own trumpet without hitting a bum note that puts off potential partners.

That’s why at LookBetterOnline, we offer a Profile Review service.

A professional profile writer will look at your profile, tell you what works, what doesn’t… and give you some practical tips to make improvements.

You’ll still have to make the changes yourself but you’ll end up with a profile that’s improved, effective… and all you.

Ask for a Profile Review here.

 

Making Your Date Work

Once your profile has done its bit, the emails have been exchanged and the interest sparked, the next step is almost scripted: dinner, candlelight… and an awkward conversation with a complete stranger.

While dinner dates are standard, they’re actually a pretty awful way for two people to get to know each other. Look back at your most successful relationships and you’ll probably find that very few of them involved getting to know someone over soup and wine. You might have worked together on projects or met through a common interest or a mutual mate. It was the friendship that turned into a relationship rather than an attempt to start a relationship with someone who was not yet even a friend.

And that’s the key to making a date work.

Forget about using a date to kickstart a new relationship. Don’t even think of it as a way to find out how much you have in common.

Think of it instead as a way to figure out whether you have the sort of chemistry that makes beautiful friendships. If that chemistry is there, if you laugh at each other’s jokes and enjoy the conversation, the rest could well follow.

The way to look for that chemistry is to keep the date informal. Romantic dinners bring too much pressure, but a daytime coffee and cake can be a much better way to let the chat flow easily, without wishing you were at home with your favorite TV show and a mug of cocoa.

And doing things together is a much more natural first step than a face-to-face interview. Trips to museums, street fairs and galleries will give you something to talk about if the conversation dries up, and are much more likely to make your time together memorable.

The best approach is to invite your date to join you in an activity you wanted to do anyway. If you’re planning to visit the farmers’ market on Sunday, then meeting someone there will add a bonus to your tomatoes and cucumbers.

And if the date doesn’t work, at least your salad will.

And remember that having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

It’s history

Over the years, singles have asked me if they should disclose their relationship history with their dating partners. While some of this information may be important for a potential partner to know, there are a few guidelines that I recommend before deciding to “bare all.”

Dear Dr. Love Coach, I am about to propose to a woman I’ve known for 15 years. We were friends in college, married other people, but now both of us are divorced. What I’m wondering is this — Is it proper for me to ask about her past relationships and/or sex life ? If so, what types of questions are okay? George

Dear George, I’m a little surprised that you’re asking for permission to inquire into your girlfriend’s relationship history this late in the game. My question to you is this — What difference would it make if you had this information? My hope is that the answer would be “not much.” So is it “proper” for you to ask about her past relationships and/or sex life? At this point, I’d have to say “no,” yet with a caveat.

Before you propose, you can ask her if there is anything in her relationship history, or something that she learned in a previous relationship, that she thinks would be important for you to know. An example might be, “Well, my previous husband refused to help around the house which was a big source of arguments between us. So I need you to know that making the effort to keep things tidy is very important to me.”

Basically, the focus needs to be on sharing historical information that would have potential relevance in your current relationship. I get concerned when I hear about singles engaging in long conversations with a potential dating partner about what led to the destruction of their previous relationships. And sometimes they haven’t even met yet!

When singles talk about their past relationship failures, they shift the focus off of building a present, and possibily even a future, with another person. Instead, the focus can shift to seeing your dating partner as someone who is inherently rejectable. In a previous article, “Decisions, Decisions, Decisions,” I stressed the importance of remaining vigilant while dating to NOT talk about past relationship failures.

But if you do feel the need to disclose aspects of your relationship history, then you should do so by emphasizing what you learned, not just about yourself, but about the kind of relationship you ultimately want.

Asking for a sexual history though is a bit more complicated. I think it’s best to be sure that both of you get tested not just for any sexually transmitted diseases, but for genetically transmitted diseases as well. The results should provide you with enough relevant information to spark a conversation about moving the relationship forward, or not.

If you have been dating “consciously” all along, then you probably have already listened carefully to what your dating partner has said, and paid close attention to her many behaviors, to have determined that she is a good candidate for your life partner. Remember though, people do grow and change over time. The decision to propose should ideally be based on the knowledge that you’ve accumulated while in an exclusive relationship. Giving more credence to historical information will not necessarily move you forward — it will just keep you in the past.

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

True love and Chemistry – Exploring Myth and Reality

When you think about the qualities found in a true “soul mate” relationship, what one word comes up most often on the top of your list?

Is it CHEMISTRY? Probably.

Just the mention of this term conjures up powerful feelings and images for anyone who has ever been in or seeking a love relationship. It is often described as a feeling that leaves you breathless, excited and weak in the knees. Palms sweat, the heart races and the body tingles with nervous anticipation.

It is believed by virtually everyone that true love cannot exist without chemistry. Therefore, the conclusion most would-be lovers come to is that if they experience these intense feelings towards someone, they have the basis for an ideal and lasting relationship.

Right? Maybe not. For this definition of chemistry is limited to one’s physical response to another person. It lacks an entire dimension that resides in our values, beliefs, personalities and worldview

In order to know you have the right connection with a potential (or existing) partner, it’s important to have a basic knowledge of what real chemistry consists of, instead of embracing only the myths that surround it. This can be difficult to do. This intense, physical passion is the stuff that Oscar winning movies and best-selling books are made of. So, take a step back for a minute and see if you recognize yourself in the following.

Sarah is a thirty something, very attractive and successful, professional female. She has been in a relationship for over a year with a man who is unfaithful, disrespectful and incapable (unwilling) to make any commitment to her. Yet, when he makes late night “booty calls”, forgets her birthday, or stands her up repeatedly – she remains available and willing, in spite of her general unhappiness and upset over their “relationship”. Why? “I think I have mistaken great sex for love. I feel this intense chemistry and physical intimacy when we are having sex, even though he offers me nothing else. Over time, it has left me unhappy and feeling badly about myself.”

John is an attractive, intelligent, 30 something male who owns his own successful business. He’s dating a woman that he thinks he is in love with. He has knowledge that she has been out with other men. She cancels dates and is often critical and emotionally distant. She refuses to discuss commitment or taking the relationship to the next level. Yet, she turns to John for emotional, physical and financial help whenever she feels she needs it. Why does John continue to see her? “She’s beautiful and the sex is great. We have such strong physical chemistry. It’s almost like an addiction for me. My friends can’t stand her and even I know she’s not really a “keeper”, but it’s hard to walk away.

These vignettes are great examples of how physical chemistry can be mistaken for the real thing. The attraction on one level is strong, yet these are not relationships that have the right elements to grow into happy and satisfying partnerships.

So, what is missing?

Kahlil Gibran defines it as “spiritual affinity”. It’s the hidden element of chemistry. It’s when two beings meet and connect on a deeper level. It can only be felt in the heart and soul. It’s about friendship, respect, humor and the feelings of warmth and contentment that come when you are in his/her presence.

People often report finding one without the other. This is understandably a cause of great frustration and confusion about whom should we choose and why. In order to understand this better, it is helpful to know how and when each facet of chemistry occurs.

Physical attraction (or lust) generally begins during our first contact with someone. It can DEVELOP into something more over time, yet some pull is there from the beginning. The chemical that results from this attraction (and intensifies it) is phenyl ethylamine – or PEA. It is a naturally occurring substance in the brain. Essentially, it is a natural amphetamine. It stimulates us and increases both physical and emotional energy. The attraction causes us to produce more PEA, which results in those dizzying feelings associated with romantic love. Another substance that is released by PEA is dopamine. This chemical increases a desire to be physically close and intimately connected.

When these chemicals are being secreted in larger doses, they send signals from the brain to the other organs of the body. If you wonder why you or someone is attracted to the “wrong” person, it may be because you are high on the physical response to these substances, which overwhelm your ability to use your head and exercise “good judgment and common sense”.

“Spiritual affinity” develops over time and repeated contact. When these feelings begin to emerge, the brain produces endorphins. These are more like morphine and result in an increased sense of calm that reduces anxiety and helps to build attachment. As relationships move into this phase they are characterized by more comfort, commitment and friendship.

Generally speaking, all “soul mate relationships” require at least some measure of each of these. The important thing to remember is that they come in stages, which is not to say that the physical attraction passes as one moves into a deeper connection. However, it changes. We cannot sustain those intense emotions as we travel down the road to commitment and a shared life. However, in healthy relationships those moments of intensity can and do occur for brief intervals at intermittent times.

Remember not to confuse great sex or deep friendship with romantic love. Instead, look for a measure of both of these in your feelings for another. For then you have the ingredients that lasting love is made from.

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

10 Ways to boost your confidence sex appeal

Confidence is everything in the dating game – so if you want to attract many dates and find the right mate, be open-minded to giving yourself a Confidence Face Lift. As a Dating Coach and Author of SMART Man Hunting (http://www.smartmanhunting.com), my goal is to help you beam with confidence sex appeal.

While confidence comes from within, Lookbetteronline.com can help you let it shine online in your photos and profile. By putting your best face online, you will also feel more confident about your presentation.

The results will show in the positive tone of your emails and phone calls, along with helping you attract dates with your top picks.

Why is confidence so important?

One 35-year-old lawyer told me, “A woman who carries herself well is 10 times more attractive to me.” Another 30-something TV Producer shared, “My Mr. Wonderful is really confident in himself and it’s something that I just pick up on.”

Confidence:

  • Is SMART and Sexy!
  • Lets dates know you like yourself and won’t put up with nonsense
  • Means you know there are many singles who are anxious to go out with you – which only makes you more attractive
  • Is when you take rejection lightly and not personally
  • Allows you to relax and enjoy the dating process
  • Makes it clear that you are not desperate – the date killer
  • Makes dating fun
  • Means you’re happy with yourself, your looks and your life

Here are 10 confidence boosters that can significantly increase your dating numbers, ego and odds of finding your mate:

10 Ways to Boost Your Confidence Sex Appeal:

  1. Recognize that you are a Hot Ticket – Start believing that you deserve only the best!
  2. Pamper Yourself – Take care of your body with makeovers, nails, new hair, and new styles – ask your friends for tips that will make you feel better about you.
  3. Treat Yourself Better – Are you eating, sleeping and exercising enough?
  4. Surround Yourself with Positive People – Find friends who are cheerleaders and make you feel good inside.
  5. Define Your Own Sexy – Don’t dress to play a part. Dress in what makes you feel sexy.
  6. Jump into your Passions – Make time for things that you love to do. You will plant a more natural smile on your face and draw the right dates.
  7. Try Something New – Try yoga, horseback riding or take a ski lesson to expand your world!
  8. Follow a No Bull Policy – Be decisive and know that you can take it or leave it. If a date doesn’t fit right, just say Next!
  9. Go After Your Dreams – Think outside your home box of possibilities and aim high with your dreams! By going after your passions, you will feel good inside.
  10. Create a Dating Plan – The more you date, the more confident you will be. One book fan in Los Angeles told me, “You’ve given me so much more confidence about dating. You got me to practice and now I found a great guy who just gets me.” And let Lookbetteronline.com help you with your photos, profile and dating coaching services.

You can do it too. Be brave. Be bold – and remember to let that confidence sex appeal shine online and offline!

Happy Hunting!

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

How to Know if You’ve Been Sent a “Form Email”

How can you tell if the email you just received was sprayed from a hose or expresses real interest?

How can you tell if the email you just received was sprayed from a hose or expresses real interest?

On a dating site, any reasonably attractive woman with a decent picture and a half  decent profile will get emails. Guys? Not so much.

The same dynamic that makes women wait for men to hit on them in the real world works on the Web as well. If men want some attention they need to step up their game.

They need great photos and a compelling and unique profile.

The men who figure out this formula do extremely well online. They end up with a host of beautiful women to choose from.

But they’re rare. Most men on dating sites still haven’t figured out how to market themselves. They still use crappy photos and dull profiles. They get hardly any responses, and when they get ignored, some get desperate.

Instead of improving the way they look, they play the numbers. If only one woman in ten writes back to them and only one in ten of those produces a date, they assume they just need to write to more women.

So these guys send emails to EVERYBODY! They forget about being selective, write one email and spray it at everyone on the dating site.

They’re a kind of human “email hose.” And they’re the kind of guys you really want to avoid.

So how can you tell if the email you just received was sprayed from a hose or expresses real interest? There are few tell-tale signs:

They’re the first in line.

The first emails you receive on a dating site are likely to be hosed. Sprayers believe that new users are clueless and will be so happy to get an email that they’ll reply right away. They’ve also hit on everyone else already. So they monitor lists of “new members” and check “who’s online” carefully looking for new faces.

The email is impersonal.

“Form emails” are cut and pasted. They make no reference to anything in your profile.

Here’s a real example:

“You seem like you might be a lotta fun. We should grab a drink sometime.”

There’s no chance that this guy read the profile. He just pasted his message into the box and hit Send. If he didn’t give you the time of day, why should you give him any of your time?

The message contains a profile.

If the email repeats information from the profile, like his age, where he lives or the color of his eyes, there’s a good chance it’s a “form email.” It’s all about the sender (who doesn’t change) and nothing about the recipient (who does). Here’s another real example:

“My name is Michael. I am a 48 year old man near Del Mar. I am originally from England and came to San Diego 18 years ago for my work . I would love to chat with you Looking forward to hearing back from you”

It’s not hard to spot a “form email” — and it’s just as easy to delete them. Reply only to the personal emails that clearly indicate that the person has read your profile. You want someone who really wants to know you, not the kind of guy who approaches every woman at a bar.

Did you ever reply to a form email? Care to share?

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!


Your online profile ad – Write for success

Where are all the good men/women? You go to parties, sign up for various activities and ask friends and family if they know anyone they can introduce you to. Yet, your dating life has been more than a little disappointing. What is a guy/girl supposed to do to find quality people?

Begin by continuing to do what you have been doing. These are all good ways to meet people. However, you may need to expand your search to the world of online dating. This would allow you to expand your search and come into contact with interested and available singles you would never meet in the existing circles in which you now move.

Perhaps you are thinking, “I have already tried this with little or mixed success.” Maybe this too has become a source of disappointment and frustration and even despair. If so, you could be going about it the wrong way, or be in need of some information to put you on a track to better success. The first important step is writing your online profile “ad” and choosing a good site to place it on.

The following are tips to help you write a great online profile.

Be Yourself

The goal of your ad is to attract the kind of person who would be compatible with you. You are looking for someone who shares your goals, values, sense of humor, lifestyle and perhaps religion or other specific criteria. If you put in information that is not true to who you are, you could send potentially good dates on to the next ad. You may also attract the kind of person you are not interested in.

Be Sincere

Nothing is more attractive than sincerity. Think about it. Isn’t this a turn-on for you? If you are funny, be funny. If you are serious, be that. Use honesty in describing your traits and desires in a potential mate. If there is something that is a must-have for you in any future relationship, highlight it. Remember that when and if you move to the next step, the other person will experience you as you really are, regardless of what the picture you drew for them in your ad looked like.

Write Like You Talk

This goes right along with being you. Don’t make your ad seem too contrived or rehearsed. You will loose that feeling of sincerity. Write a few drafts and just let the thoughts flow. Then go back and edit it. Make sure you spell check and check again. There is no bigger turn-off than someone who appears to have poor grammar or spelling.

Be Specific, But Leave Out Hang-Ups and Other Negatives

This is a first step. You want to put your true best forward. The picture you paint should be upbeat and positive. Everyone has a past. It’s not wise too tell too much too soon. If you feel something is important, than put it in. A good example is “single mom”, “divorced father of two”, etc. Leave out the part about looking for someone to help me heal from a painful divorce.

Do not mention past relationships except to inform that you had one.

Highlight Your Uniqueness

There are things about us all that make us uniquely who we are. Let your ad portray this. If you have a special talent, interesting career or pastime, let people know about it. If it’s important to you, it tells others much. If someone out there shares it, they will be drawn to what you have written.

Find a unique way to highlight yourself. If you look like someone well known, put that in. Just remember, if you look like Woody Allen, don’t portray yourself as a Robert Redford type.

Avoid classic turn-offs

If you place a heavy emphasis on finding someone who is “beautiful” or “wealthy”, you will turn off many people- often the very people who hope to attract. No one wants to be wanted for his or her looks or bank account. It also says something about you. How about superficial?

Use a Picture

This is very important. Ads that don’t have one get far fewer responses. Many singles are having a professional picture made of them. You want to look like your BEST self. A professional can usually do a much better job at a very reasonable cost if you shop around a bit.

Post Your Ad On The Right Site

There are so many choices out there. Look for one that has a large membership of people who appear to be compatible with you. Make sure they have an enforced safety and privacy policy. There are specialty sites for people who seek a partner with a very particular passion or lifestyle. These include but are not limited to: animal lovers, vegetarians, advanced degreed professionals, and sites for people seeking those of the same faith.

If your requirements include someone within a close geographical distance, look for the sites that offer you a good selection.

Once you have given it careful thought and a little research and energy, write and post your ad for success.

Remember, we attract what we are, not what we want.

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

Do You Dress Up… And Down, Stay In… And Go Out?

You might think that surfing online dating sites and checking out profiles can only be fun.

You’d be wrong.

While you hope that the next page could reveal the love of your life, blurred pictures and clichéd descriptions can lose their shine after the first dozen or so. In this month’s newsletter, we reveal how to dump the dull phrases and let the real you shine through.

And with online dating now as mainstream as sushi for two, we explain why you still shouldn’t put all your eggs on the Web, and reveal the secret that turns online singles into happy couples.

Read on…

Do You Dress Up… And Down, Stay In… And Go Out?

Log on to any major dating site, and you’ll be told that gazillions of people are members, billions are currently online and millions have already met, married and are living happily ever after. Or almost as many.

With huge numbers of people flooding dating sites, you’d expect that reading a profile would be like opening a new book. Each would be unique, individual and filled with character, just like the person who wrote it.

And yet, spend more than half an hour on any dating site, and you could be forgiven for thinking that you’re looking at a matchmaking company for Stepford Wives.

Every other profile says exactly the same thing. The same phrases turn up on profile after profile:

“I’m comfortable in jeans… and a little black dress.”

“I like going out… and staying in sometimes to watch TV.”

“I like movies, books and music…”

Well, of course you do. Everybody wears clothes, which is what the first phrase says. Everybody likes to leave their house sometimes and to come back to it after a while, which is what the second sentence says. And everyone likes to entertain themselves with entertainment products. That’s what they’re for.

The reader can safely assume that the person behind the profile can wear clothes that suit different occasions. He can also assume that he’ll like to laugh (the laughter itself is usually a giveaway), that he’s loyal to his friends (the people he’s not loyal to are called “bosses”) and that he’s passionate about something (even if it’s lying in bed from Friday night to Monday morning).

There are some things about each other that we can just take for granted. You don’t need to mention them on a profile.

What you can mention on a profile though, is where you go when you get dressed up, which movie you saw last and what you thought of it. And what you’d really like to do if you didn’t have to work for a living and had a private jet at your disposal.

All of those things tell the reader who you are. They tell the reader what’s unique about you and what they can expect life with you to be like. And they do it without wasting space on a profile with phrases that say nothing.

If your profile makes you sound like a robot, cut the clichés and talk about you. It’s what we want to know.

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!


How to Choose Online dating photos

We like to think that when dating online, daters are spoilt for choice. With so many singles available, the toughest decision you should have to make is who to write to first.

That might well be your toughest decision, but it won’t be your first. To make the most of the opportunities on your dating site you will need great online dating photos (this is key). For many people, that means scouring through their hard drive and picking out the pictures that show them at their best. But how do you choose a photo that wins looks, emails and dates? Here’s what you should consider as you’re digging through your pictures folder.

Are your features clear?

Most photographs are taken to record a moment but a profile photo should be a record of you. “We should be able to see your eyes, your features and definitely your smile,” says Merav Knafo, co-founder of LookBetterOnline.com, a service that matches online singles with professional photographers. “Good online dating photos don’t just show what you look like, they reveal who you are.”

Are there any distractions?

Relationships are all about give-and-take but when you’re looking for the right partner for that relationship, you have to put your needs and yourself first. That means uploading a photograph that’s all about you – a picture which gives you the limelight and wins attention. As you’re doing the choosing, put aside any pictures in which the background, the foreground or your friends distract from what’s really important: you.

What does your expression say?

Every relationship starts with a look but it’s the type of look you give that determines whether the person you’re admiring looks back at you or overlooks you. Match a glance with a smile and you’re in with a shout. Combine your wink with a frown and you’ll look like someone to avoid.

That’s just as true of your photos as it is of the unspoken communication that happens at parties. “One of the questions that we always ask our photographers is what they do to help our clients relax,” explains Merav. “Your photo should create the impression that time with you will be fun. That can only come with an expression that suggests you’re happy and at ease.”

Are your Online dating photos good… or convenient?

Just about everyone today has pictures of themselves on their hard drive so uploading something rarely takes a great deal of effort. But a little extra work at this stage of your search can take you a long way. Just as you’d invest time in getting ready for a date, so it’s worth skipping the convenience of a photo you have available for a photo created specifically for dating.

You might have to do a little more than open your photos folder but the result could be less time looking for a date and more dates with the sort of people you’re looking for.

And remember that having great online dating photos is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!