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Book Review: Falling in Love with Me (Marcy Morrison)

One of the hidden benefits of outstanding dating profile photos is that people look at them and feel good about themselves-I love it when a customer looks at their photos and says “I Like me!

Feeling comfortable “In our own skin” is a REALLY great preface to having a good experience when dating.

Take a little time

When I came across this little book that Marcy wrote I was a little skeptical, I mean it’s just a few pages long and could be easily read in an afternoon. But when I met Marcy over a coffee here in San Diego I promised her that I would spend a little time working on the concepts in the book prior to reviewing it!

No Prejudices

I would urge anyone to put their logical mind “aside for a day” and read this with an open mind! And while some people may not believe in “Soulmates” or “The Universe” there is MUCH practical wisdom in this book, namely:

1-Let yourself Find out who you are
2-Open yourself to allow more of what you want in
3-Value and Appreciate and honor  Who you are every day
4-Enjoy and express you

And for the record great L.O.V.E acronym Marcy!

Size doesn’t matter.

Don’t be deceived by the size of this book too- it asks important Questions (one of the things I like about Marcy is her ability to ask BIG QUESTIONS so gently)

…..What would your life look like if it was working the way you want it to?
What do you need to shed that is no longer serving you?…

The Value

This book is of value because when we feel better about ourselves we have the potential to enjoy life more and enjoy the process of dating more too! (We become literally MORE ATTRACTIVE)

To order a copy CLICK HERE

Dating Tips: Focus + Action = Law of attraction?

Many of us reach a point in our lives when, time is very important to us and we want to find someone special to spend it with.

Tough or easy?

Dating can be tough or easy!

A horseshoe magnet over a white backgroundAs we get older we might have been through a more than one failed relationship and many of us wonder whether it’s even worth the bother to be back in the dating game.
At least we think that until we see lovers on the street, or it’s a Friday night in front of the television and we dream about meeting someone special.

I firmly believe that finding love is possible for most of us if we’re willing to take the time to prepare for it!

Focus

I believe in very practical terms that we, for the most part we get what we focus on and that:

1. If we don’t believe that we’ll ever find someone special for us, then, guess what? We will probably be right, we’ll give up looking and we most likely won’t find that someone special.

2.If we believe that we can find love, then we’ll be way more open to finding love and way more likely to find it!

Make it happen

Sitting back and waiting for something to happen just by focus alone might take a little longer than going out and making it happen!

I firmly believe that life favors action!

Action is

1. Deciding that you can have lovedating and law of attraction

2. Putting yourself out there and letting life lead us to someone special

So think about what your perfect partner would look like and then go out and meet new people and join groups and go to social events and let life lead you to someone who’s loving and right for you!

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

3 Tips for Finding someone special in 2014

If you’re reading this then I hope you’ll have your best year ever and find someone special.
Here’s 2 simple tips to get you started

1. Make love a priority without urgency.

We’ve all heard: “When the time is right the right you’ll meet the right person.” But “we’ve also been told to “Go out and make it happen”

I think a balance between these 2 points of view is a healthy balance.
Resolve to go out and meet people AND look online so that you have a better chance of finding love, and don’t force it…(forcing things is way too needy) the trick is to take action and spend time letting things unfold

And when you go on a first date don’t already start examining if you could spend the rest of your life with them. Don’t go there!…There is way less pressure just getting to know your date…learn more about a new person, not just fall in love with a romantic fantasy.

2. First impressions count.

Before you get a date you need to attract someone special! What kind of first impression do you make, whether online or in-person?
Online, having great online dating photos is the most important thing you can do when dating online, we all look at the photos first! so visit LookBetterOnline and and see how with great profile pictures we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!And your profile is well written- If your personal look could use some improvement, then do it whether it’s new clothes or hairstyle..

2. Confidence is key

Confidence is key! And I don’t mean cockiness…I mean the confidence to be authentic!
If you’re nervous about a first date then you might want to try some exercise an hour or two prior to getting ready and going out (Often being in your body will get you “Out” of your nervous mind)
And when it comes to talking- stay in the comfort zone by coming up with a few subjects that won’t get you into trouble (And AVOID at all costs Politics or Religion!…I know obvious eh!)
If you’re not sure what to talk about then  ask your date about their life, listen and go from there.
Also don’t forget there’s is a fine line between being confidence and cocky – nobody likes a cocky guy who is too cool, so keep it real

Ways to feel more confident:

Don’t slouch!
Take a couple of deep breaths and Stand or sit  tall! Pull your shoulders back  and pick your chin up No one looks confident if they are always looking down!

Slow down and take a breath
When you get nervous, your voice goes up and you’ll talk faster than you realize.  These are two dead giveaways for lack of confidence…so breathe deeply and relax…It’s not a race to impress her!

Seasons Greetings and an offer

Happy Christmas to all our readers…..I hope that you have a wonderful day!

Holiday online dating offer: Valid between Christmas day and the new year!
Simply enter promo code “holiday” and receive $30 off a dating profile photo session

(*Offer applies to full price photo session: exaple $197 package for just $167)

How to overcome dating rejection and rebuild your self-esteem.

99.9% of people who date online will at some point feel rejection. Perhaps it’s an unanswered email, or you have a wonderful first date and then never hear from the person again, or perhaps you have a few dates and the person decides that you’re simply not a good match for them

For most people this really hurts! And many people are left miserable with a feeling of lower self-esteem, questioning whether that are smart, or rich or beautiful or good enough to find someone special!

“There must be something wrong with me” they often say.

The answer to overcome dating rejection is actually quite simple! After rejection you need to rebuild your self-esteem! OK let’s get started

Step 1: Make a list

Make a list of 50 qualities you have that are important in a partner such as being loving, kind, considerate, a great lover, a great friend, a great sense of humor…now this may take a while but don’t stop until you have at least 50 good things about you

Step 2: Do something you love

Take a day off and do something that you  love. Whether its golfing for a day, watching movies while eating Ice-cream or going skydiving take some time to treat yourself to show yourself that you’re worthy of some good times

Step 3: Change the way you think!

Change the way you think of the dating process! Meeting someone special can take a while so remember there’s nothing wrong with you! If you go into dating with the belief that you’ll meet people who don’t think you’re a match and meet people you don’t think are a match before you meet your “someone special” then  dating can be way more fun.

Another important thing you need to know…get good dating profile pictures

Having  great dating profile pictures is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how with great online dating photos we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

 

The easy way to enjoy online dating

I’ll keep this post short and useful!

I’ve talked to many people who hate online dating!

The Story

The usual story goes like this:

“I’m way too busy at work to meet many new people,  so I decided that online dating would be a good idea, but now I hate going on so many dates with strangers who are definitely not who I’m looking for! I wish I wasn’t single and I could meet the one for me and stop dating”

Endless date after date…hoping that the next person will be the special one doesn’t sound like much fun!

Remember all the dates you felt disappointed when things didn’t work out the way you expected? when you thought that he or she could be the right one and 10 minutes into your date you were so disappointed?

A different story

Here’s an easier way to look at online dating

“I’m way too busy at work to meet many new people,  so I decided that meeting people online would be a good idea, I know that I might have to meet a lot of people to find someone special but I’m in no rush and in the meantime I can meet lots of people and hear lots of different perspectives on the world. Eventually I’ll find someone special even if it takes a while”

Chill out

When tell ourselves a better “Story” about our dating then we can finally “chill out” and relax a little.
Going on a date now has no pressure, no expectations, you can simply get to know another human being.

Letting life unfold

letting life unfold gracefully for us is an art, yet the more we practice it the happier we’ll be.

Think About This!

13Before you get a date you need to attract someone special!
Having great online dating photos is the most important thing you can do when dating online, we all look at the photos first! so visit LookBetterOnline and and see how with great profile pictures we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

Meet to Marry Book…Well worth a read

Book

LookBetterOnline.com
Book Review:

I liked Bari Lyman before reading her “Meet to Marry Book”.

Both Bari and her Husband Michael (Well you wouldn’t want to take advice from an expert who wasn’t happily married) are smart, easy going individuals who have a great way of looking at life…when it comes to finding love they tell people to “Become the person you’d like to meet”.

It’s about YOU being the one

meet to mary dating adviceBari teaches that the first step in finding love is to start acting like someone who both deserves and wants a life full of love, someone who’s ready to give and receive love.

In other words, it’s not about you finding the right person; it’s about YOU being the right person.  In Bari’s words

“Someone who is busy ‘being the one’ knows that he or she has the power to change his/her dating reality and then takes powerful steps to do so,”

Mixed messages

Bari goes on to say. “Write down how you want to feel in a relationship and then ask yourself: Am I treating myself the way that I want to feel?
If not, you’ve got to first change the way you treat yourself. For example: If you want to feel understood and accepted by a partner but don’t treat yourself with respect or accept who you really are, you’re sending out mixed messages… and that alone will attract people who don’t value you. “See what happens when you treat yourself the same way you want to be treated by your perfect match,” advises Lyman.

Bari’s Passion

Speaking with Bari it’s clear that helping people to “be the one to find the one” is her passion.
So when Bari and her Husband  Michael offered to send me a copy of their Book “Meet to Marry” I waited eagerly for it to arrive in the mail.

First impressions

I love the book cover, OK, OK I know this isn’t super important but it’s fun and definitely made me want to dive in and get reading!

This book is written around the idea that you can:

1. ASSESS your marriage readiness.
2. ATTRACT the kind of person you desire.
3. ACT in the present to attract the future

What I like about it is that it’s a book that’s not designed for insights or intellectual conversations…its designed to get results.
Let’s look at the 3 steps in a little more detail.

STEP 1: ASSESS.

This involves taking a “Marriage readiness” quiz, then having a “Reality check” and then “Challenging your thinking”

A quiz with different answers
Now we’ve all taken quick tests where you answer A, B, C or D. Then you’ll add up all the A’s, B’s C’s or D’s and find your score and read the answer to the test. While this test does just that it also provides the reader with deeper answers to each question answered, I found this method very effective and helpful-it’s an easy way to provide the reader with clear and meaningful answers.

A reality Check.

Then the book took an important direction to focus on “Blind spots” and dating, Blind spots in dating are the things that stop people from finding love. And Bari uses real life examples to challenge the way that you’ll think about yourself. I really liked this section.

Blind spots love

A different way of thinking.

In the third part of step 1 Bari offers great insight on not living in reality when it comes to dating, on Carrying around negative associations when it comes to dating, on not being true to yourself, on being over critical when it comes to yourself and dating and on being unavailable.

Bari goes on to talk about Good Advice and Bad advice, I like this hard hitting chapter Bari gives an example of another Dating coaches advice, and why she disagrees with it and finished this step by examining some dating myths and stereotypes.

STEP 2: ATTRACT.

Mari starts with a section called Why Marry.
The following part of this step helps the reader get clear about exactly what they want.
Mari does this by helping the reader create a “Happiness and finding my life partner journal”, a “Dream board” and a “Marriage vision”

STEP 3: ACT. (In the present)

This chapter is all about Action.

I’ve always agreed with the concept of Acting in the present to attract the future. There are way too many people who don’t enjoy the lives that they deserve simply because they fail to take action!

This chapter is the perfect end to any book written to help you make change.

In summary.

Well written and easy to follow its obvious Bari and her husband have spent a significant amount of time, love and energy on creating a system that will help many people find the love that they deserve!

This is a GREAT book, well thought out and well written. I’ve given this book 4.5 out of 5 stars…because I NEVER give anything 5 stars and I found the forward a little difficult (and to be fair I’ve said this before I’m not into reading the introductions of ANY book)
Here’s a link to buy your copy!  Don’t delay…order yourself a copy and start moving towards the love you deserve( Click here )

Dating tips for Guys who have been dumped (Dump the drama and Grow some balls)

Wow that’s a harsh Blog title isn’t it! Sorry if it seems harsh I just wanted to get your attention and help you get to a happier place

A True Story

Let me tell you a true story about a friend of mine!

My friend (Let’s call him Dave) was going through a messy divorce..he had married the girl of his dreams only to find out that a few years later his dream had died and she was leaving him and wanted a divorce. Now Dave was a wreck, he was pleading with his wife to try and work things out, grasping at anything he could to try to make his marriage work.

What was painfully obvious to all his guy friends was that she’d met a new guy and was cheating on him (She’s been posting pictures of her new boyfriend on Facebook and it seemed that everyone but Dave knew what was going on!)

I wanted to help Dave

I wanted to help Dave and I knew a man that could help him…

Let me introduce my great friend Anthony Clark…he’s a former professional male escort and dating coach, he’s a great friend to me, a loveable, Authentic character who walks his talk!

I thought that if I could persuade Dave to talk to Anthony and read his book- so that he could begin the process of picking himself up from his messy divorce.

The name of his book…

He met Anthony and immediately liked him…then Anthony told him to read a copy of his book, the book is called

“How to Get Over That Bitch and Grow Balls They Can’t Resist”

ballsNow let’s be clear from the very beginning…Anthony says:

“This book was not written to degrade or humiliate women. I use the term “Bitch,” to express the anger and frustration that men feel towards the women who dumped them, or have broken their hearts.
The “Bitch,” whom I am referring to in the title… can also pertain to a man, a boss, or anyone who treats you with disrespect!”

Written by relationship expert and former male escort, Anthony Clark “The Game Dr.” Co-written by Melanie Kira Clark.
This is a 196 page fast, easy and hilarious read that will forever change the way you love & date.Perfect for men of all ages…and perfect to read if you’ve just been dumped!

Dave refused to read the book

What was frustrating to me was that Dave refused to read the book properly, he read a few pages and angrily told me that the book was written for “Meat-heads”.

I think that Dave didn’t read the book fully because if he did it would mean that he had to grow some balls and change! (Sorry Dave if you’re reading this you know I love you man)

I also think (And while I’m no expert just a regular guy I’m not stupid) that Dave was trying so hard to make things right in his failing marriage that he ended up behaving in a desperate, needy and submissive relationship with his soon to be ex wife.

His Ball-less behavior made her lose passion, admiration, and respect for him.

A year and a half later

Now this blog post isn’t designed to bash Dave (In fact a year and a half later he’s learning once again to grow some balls, step up and I see that he’s becoming a happier guy).
What amazes me is just how much time he wasted crying in his beer!

If  he’s just read the book I’m TOTALLY CONVINCED  that he would have save himself a year of unhappiness!

SO guys if you are reading this and you’ve been dumped OR you know a friend who’s a mess and who’s crying in his beer after his lady has dumped him for the sake of $20 get this book! It’ll save you a ton of wasted time and drama!

And then  read it!….

Think About This!

Having great online dating photos is the most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and and see how with great profile pictures we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

Should you have sex on the first date?

If you’re a woman most dating coaches will tell you NOT to have sex on the first date.

Deep emotional ties=Bad choices?

Their reasoning is that sex creates deep emotional ties for women, and that when women have sex that they are highly likely to become emotionally attached to the man, and therefore make bad choices. The conclusion many coaches come to is that saving sex too soon might compel women to stay in relationships that are just not right for them.

The Amazing Clarks

Today I’d like to introduce you to my great friends Anthony and Melanie The Amazing Clarks, and let them tell you that its OK to have sex on the first date

The information for you

So why am I giving you both sides of the story? Well I want to give you the information, so that you can really think about what works for you and act according to what will bring you most joy!

2 short Videos

So lets look at 2 short videos, the first an introduction to the Clarks and then their thoughts about Sex on the first date

Introduction to the Amazing Clarks

what make us different

Sex on the first date

sex on first date

Why many women never get a second date.

Meet my new friend Pamela. As a dating expert she is fascinated with relationships and has spent the last fifteen years of her life studying and observing relationships and human behavior.

In Pamela’s words “

“My dating experiences began after my ex-husband and I were divorced. Before I married, I was a serial monogamist, going from one relationship to another. When I met my ex-husband, we were good friends and he was good marriage material. But something was missing. After we divorced, I bought into all the stereotypical beliefs that I was too old, there are no good men out there, there are no single men where I live and I was afraid of getting hurt. I was afraid that I had made a huge mistake and lost my only chance for love. I was afraid I would be alone the rest of my life. When I realized that sitting home with dirty hair, Doritos, and ice cream was not getting me anywhere, I gathered the courage and decided to date.

Dating support community

Pamela started a “Dating Support Community” to help people find their ideal relationship by learning to date in a way that is fun, easy and works for them! To find out more about what  Pamela does click here

Single women

I often speak to single women who tell me that they have had a terrible time dating , and that often they meet a nice man who seems interested in them- only to go on a first date and then never hear from him again.

Meeting “The One”

They get all excited and think that perhaps they’ve met “The One” and then they feel super-disappointed after being dumped after just one date!

Expert advice from Pamela

Here’s what Pamela has to say about this important subject…

Dumped After Just One Date!

Here is my story of how i was dumped after the first date! How I met a man I really liked, who really liked me back and then after just one date called me to say “I just don’t want to waste your time….”! So here’s the low down of exactly what I did right and then my critical mistake that changed everything!!

So here we go…

One day out of the blue, I was contacted by a man on Facebook. I was busy and building my business so I did not give him much thought. He was ok looking but not great AND based on his Facebook page, I thought he was an unemployed handyman so I was just not interested in him. But for months he kept pursuing me and we seemed to have a lot in common so finally, I decided what the heck and gave him my phone number.

Well as it turns out, he was an engineer, NOT unemployed and we had a lot in common. We both loved animals, enjoyed the outdoors, he was spiritual and we had similar backgrounds.

Dating Mistake No 1:

Being too judgmental based on a profile. Many men do NOT write good profiles. Give them a chance!

So we began to talk on the phone and regularly exchanged flirty texts with fun pictures. I was having fun while getting to know him.

Great Dating Move No. 1:

Being patient and taking the time to get to know someone before going out on date. And having fun and flirting at the same time.

But after several weeks of texts and calling I began to wonder when was I ever going to meet this guy? So when he text me again I made a joke about when my handsome new friend who had been flirting with me for weeks was ever going to ask me out. And then I let him ask me out.

Great Dating Move No. 2:

If waiting for a date seems to drag on, instead of getting frustrated or confrontational, ask for what you want in a fun and light way, then let him take the initiative.

Finally, we had our first date and I was so disappointed. I did not like him! In fact he bugged me! We were walking around downtown, and he kept making me stand on the inside of the sidewalk. I had to keep changing sides over and over and moving my purse back and forth. I was so annoyed and I wanted the date to end SOON. I thought-where is the guy I have been talking to for weeks?

Dating Mistake No 2:

Being too critical and judgmental. Remember, most people are nervous on a first date! Cut them some slack. He was making an effort and being a gentleman. Instead of appreciating him, I was judging him!

But I remembered my own coaching and I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. He was holding my hand the whole time, and while he annoyed me, I did not feel repulsed by him. So I stopped being in my critical mind and paid attention to how I felt. I realized I was kind of attracted to him. So I decided to show interest in him, practice flirting and focus on just having fun.

Great Dating Move No. 3:

Being polite, focusing on making your date feel comfortable, having a good time and just being interested in getting to know someone as a person.

The second I changed my perspective the whole date changed. We sat down by a fountain and began to talk. Suddenly it was like our phone conversations again. We had tons of stuff to talk about and I began to really like him and feel really attracted to him.

It began to get late and he suggested we have dinner. He took me to sushi restaurant and we sat down to eat. At this point, I began thinking about how I could really like this guy. And that he may be the one. Before I had been holding back at bit, but I felt myself start to get excited.

Dating Mistake No. 3:

This was the beginning of the end. Thinking he may be The One on a first date is a huge mistake. The imaginary relationship had begun and was about to ruin EVERYTHING!

During dinner, temporary insanity took over and I began to confide in him some personal issues I was experiencing in my life.

Shortly after that he said “it is getting late we should be going”. He walked me to my car, kissed me on the cheek and gave me a warm hug.

Later, he text me to make sure I got home ok. I text him back that I was on the phone talking to a girlfriend about her break-up. Thanks for dinner, I had fun.

Two days later he called me and said it was not going to work out because “I was all over the place” and he was ready to settle down.

What the heck happened?

We had a four-hour first date. He was affectionate, took me out to dinner, text me that night? I was glowing, I thought the date was great.

CRITICAL DATING MISTAKE THAT KILLED THE ATTRACTION: The second I decided I really liked him and that he could be “The One,” I treated him differently. I changed!

Before that moment, he was the one who was really interested in me, he was the one pursuing me.

But the second I started to really like him, I began acting like we were already in a relationship ON OUR FIRST DATE! I confided in him as if he was already my boyfriend. I opened up too much!

I confided private information about my life. When he text me I rambled on about my girlfriend’s break up instead of a polite thank you for your dinner.

So this is the pattern that I see a lot

When you begin to actually like a man, you become too eager.

When you are not interested in a man, you hold back more and that holding back is what makes him more attracted to you.

John Gray of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus explains the first stage in dating is attraction. He says:

“When a man is attracted to a woman, he gets excited because he anticipates that he can make her happy. He wants the opportunity to pursue her. When a woman is too eager to please, a man doesn’t experience the distance he needs to pursue her. Without movement and the opportunity for more, a man can easily lose the interest necessary to move through all five stages of dating.”

So what about all the men you are not interested in?

When a man is interested in you, he tries to please you and impress you. Many times you find his eagerness repelling.

Take my date, when he was trying to be a gentleman and hold my hand, and “protect me” by walking on the street side of the sidewalk. I was totally annoyed.
When I stopped being judgmental and allowed myself to be taken care of my feelings toward him totally changed.

One of my VIP clients is gorgeous, successful, smart, sweet, adventurous and fun- a great catch. I had her keep a dating log of all the men she talked to and dated. The log was filled with a long list of he “never called back”, “never asked me out” except one man. She wrote: “I enjoyed talking with him and he seemed to want a relationship and talked about things openly. But he seemed “pushy” and wanted to take me out to a casino, give me money to gamble with and was into planning things but a little too much too soon. I felt uncomfortable.”

Newsflash- a man who is willing to make plans and wants to take care of you is a sign of a man who is interested you and is available for a commitment.

So if it is a turn off to you when a man shows his interest and it feels like he is “trying to hard” when he wants to take care of you, how are you going to ever get into a committed relationship?

I suggest that you give these men a chance. Go out with them a few times. Get to know them. Look beyond the fact that they have “no game”.

In the seduction community- men who teach other men how to sleep with women- one of the first tricks they teach is to insult women several times during the night. This, they say, is guaranteed to make her want to go home with them.

If you are interested in men who are “hard to get” and who “hold back”, then you are reversing the masculine/feminine dynamic and you are becoming the aggressor. Being the aggressor will not get you into the committed relationship you are looking for.

So be open minded to men who are interested in you and want to take care of you. If you really want to be in a committed relationship, these are the guys. And they will probably treat you much better than the men who “have game”. The reason some men are so good at dating is because they have done it a lot- they are players.

Stay Present

Learn how to date casually. Stay present. Take your time getting to know someone. Take it slow. Give him the space to pursue you. And when he does, show appreciation. Give him a chance and practice allowing yourself to be taken care of.

Before you know it you will find your true love, a man who loves you and NEVER disappears!

Think About This too!

Having great online dating photos is the most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and and see how with great profile pictures we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!