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Become a babe magnet without surgery or drugs!

“I’d like to find a partner who dances.  Do you?” my profile on Match.com asked.  My now-husband Drew emailed that he was willing to take lessons, and that was enough for me.  Non-dancer Drew’s courage to put himself out on the dance floor and to show in lesson after lesson his amateur status was truly impressive.  We took private dance instruction for a year before our wedding, and as a result, got around the dance floor quite gracefully at our
reception.

Women are dying to dance.  Any man who can ask a woman to dance, then take charge of what happens on the floor and move relatively smoothly to music, has enormous appeal.  Fat or skinny, short, tall, or not even close to attractive, even old, old, old, a man who is comfortable on the dance floor has his pick of the ladies.

For whatever the reason, dancing intoxicates.  Especially women.

Few men can really dance, and those guys are on the floorconstantly.  Some men think they can dance and do get up, ask the ladies, and have fun.  But at least half the men sit or stand uncomfortably on the sidelines with all the women who wish to be on the dance floor.

We women don’t get to dance nearly as much as we’d like to, even the ladies who are good dancers.  There aren’t enough dancing men to go around. You can almost feel the yearning, the sadness, and the disappointment in those women and between those non-dancing couples.  And the non-dancing guys?  Pathetic.

I personally know three women close to my age who met their now – spouses on the dance floor, and those ladies were great catches! Gentlemen and ladies, there’s a message here.

Guys:

  1. Take lessons and learn how to dance.  Leading well takes skill, but if Drew could learn how, so can you.
  2. Go to dances.
  3. Ask women to dance.  Lots of women.  They’ll love it.  Even if you aren’t so good, they’ll appreciate your efforts.

Dance lessons themselves are good places to meet women, and most dance studios have regular parties for their students to practice what they have learned.

Ladies:

  1. Take dancing lessons yourself and learn how to follow.  Here I was, 50 years old, thinking I loved to dance, and I had no idea how to do the woman’s part!  Following takes skill!  You have to figure out what your partner has in mind for you to do in a split second, and then actually do it, all while dancing backwards.
  2. Buy yourself some real ballroom dancing shoes, maybe with high heels.  Believe it or not, those shoes are comfortable. They have to be.  Not only do they look very sexy, they stay on your feet!
  3. Hang out at dances, too, if you like to dance.  Single guys go to dances.

If you are connected to a dance studio, other single women will be at their parties as well as the studio instructors and male students, so you will know people.  Dance parties are safe and comfortable for single women.

Guys — nothing enhances as man’s romantic marketability more than becoming a decent dancer.  Learning to dance is cost

efficient and relatively painless.  No surgery or blood loss, no sweaty hours at the gym, no personality makeovers needed. Just dance lessons.

What’s stopping you?  Look up the dance studio nearest you and make that call!  You’ll become a dancing babe magnet!

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

Kathryn Lord © 2004 All Rights Reserved

Seven secret strategies for finding love

Get out of the house.  Learn to be comfortable sitting solo at Barnes and Noble, and over wine or soda at Café Marmelade.

Be a people magnet.  Develop your inner flirt.  Practice chatting up total strangers at the UPS Store, at the Mobil station, at Trader Joe’s.

Be the initiator. Don’t wait for invitations, rather look for and pounce on those chance encounters, which happen for each of us every day.  Have cards printed with your phone number and email address, offer them to those you meet, ask for theirs, and get comfortable reaching out to initiate dates with old and new friends.

Develop your Romance Marketing Plan.  Create and follow a proactive strategy to jump-start your love life.  Pop online, join a local club or dating agency, throw some parties – do whatever it takes to get your cute face on a date with one or two new, prospective partners each month.

Primp.  Get fit, stay fit, care about your hair and what you wear – this is California, where appearances matter, perhaps more than they should.  Take those few extra moments before going out to look your best.  Get current, flattering photos of the adorable YOU, and have the courage to use them online.

Think possibility.  Look for what’s right (not for what’s wrong) with each person you encounter.  Always accept invitations, use your ears more than your mouth, make your purpose to enrich and contribute to the life of each person fortunate enough to bump into and be with YOU.

Be happy – Engage in the activities you truly enjoy, keep learning, keep growing, be giving, be loving.  Be the type of person you’d like to attract, and watch who shows up!

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!

Am I being too picky?

As a matchmaker and dating expert, the biggest frustration I have is watching GREAT people overlook other GREAT people for what are in my estimation…superficial reasons.

Here’s a fun little test that will reveal to you the answer to the question, “Am I being too picky?” Take a look at the last 10 to 20 ‘Candidates’ who’ve crossed your path. People you’ve dated, people you’ve selected through an online service, or just people you’ve met through your world whom you found interesting, attractive, and date-worthy. Go ahead – make the list. And start keeping this list and adding to it into the future. Every person you find date-worthy…write his name on your list.

Secondly, note by that person’s name if he/she was also interested in YOU. Did this person pursue you? Was he/she attracted to you? Did this candidate “go for” you? OK, here’s the tough part. Now you’ve got to do the math. I say, if the percentage of people on your “hot list” who also go for YOU is greater than 50%, then YIPPEE, you’re on track. If, however, a small percentage of your targeted candidates are interested in and attracted to you, then…we’ve got a problem. Tough as it is to accept, if the math shows you that less than 25% of your targeted date-worthy candidates are also interested in you, then it’s possible, um, well, likely actually that you’re being too picky. What to do about it?

You’ve got two choices: 1) Do some serious strategic and proactive marketing to better your chances in our highly competitive romantic culture (join dating services and singles clubs and be proactive, develop your flirting skills, meet lots and lots of people.) 2) Re-evaluate how you are doing your selecting, wrestle with and broaden your search criteria. A general rule of thumb to follow is – if you’re not averaging a better than 50% “Yes Factor” for the men or women you’re targeting, then you’re being too selective and limiting yourself too much to be able to expect success. Homework assignment: Make your long list of the criteria you’re seeking in your mate.

Go ahead, brainstorm, and have some fun with it. Then take a long walk and come back to that list. Isolate the Top Three Critical Criteria. Tough? You bet, but so important. Keep this short list handy, and notice that as you go through the dating process it might just change on you. If the guy/gal you’re considering has all three of your Top Three Critical Criteria, then I say, when in doubt, GO FOR IT. Meet this new person. Still in doubt? Meet again. Still don’t know?

Meet one more time. We gals have the ability to fall in love over time, for the right reasons. If the CRITICAL stuff lines up, then I’d suggest (and so would your mama) saying Yes to meeting and exploring the possibilities with those who meet your critical criteria. That magical thing called human bonding doesn’t even begin to show up until date number three. Be willing to stretch on the issues of lesser importance (height, hair issues, age, income, etc.

Keep the heart and the eyes open, or heck, blindfold yourself! I often wonder if sightless singles have an advantage in today’s media crazed world. And be willing to be surprised as to whom He or She just might turn out to be!

Dating online? The most important thing you need to know…

Having a great photo is the single most important thing you can do when dating online, so visit LookBetterOnline and find out why more than 98% of our customers get better dates, and see how we can help make your online dating experience successful and more fun than you thought possible!